Have you ever been with your family over the holidays, when all of a sudden, you revert to a much younger age? Maybe your parents or siblings say or do something that used to drive you nuts, and you find yourself becoming a resentful teenager. Or perhaps you slip back to your five-year-old self, trying to please everyone and keep …
Quarantine Creativity
Feeling stressed in quarantine? Create. Bored? Create. And I don’t just mean making your own face mask, though I have seen some amazing creations for those. You don’t have to be a talented painter, poet, sculptor, or musician. . . each of us has a natural, curious, creative spirit that many of us have squashed since we were kids. What …
Herman the Avocado Tree
Before my 80-year-old neighbor, Phyllis, moved into a home, she gave all of her plants to neighbors and friends. Ol’ Phyllis had obviously done that 5thgrade science thing where you stick an avocado pit in a glass of water then replant it when its roots start to grow. What she handed me looked like Charlie Brown’s Christmas tree: a bent-over …
Being Happy with What Is
Recently, a friend gave me a book whose core message was to appreciate what we have, instead of always focusing on having more and being more. My first reaction: Pissed. The author is wealthy. Easy to be happy with what you have when you’re sitting on piles of dough. The writer goes on to say that even people who are …
Hope vs. False Expectations
What’s the difference between hope and false expectations? How do we know when to hope for the best and when we’re deluding ourselves? In each case, we’re throwing ourselves open to faith, to things we can’t control or predict. Is there such a thing as healthy and unhealthy hope, and if so, where’s the line? On the one hand, I’ve often found the …
At Peace with the Puddle
Three weeks ago, my life fell apart. After yet one more wish that didn’t come true, it all came crashing down. Like Humpty Dumpty cracked wide open, I saw painfully clearly all the ways I’d been living that were keeping me unhappy: doubting myself, clutching to specific outcomes, and measuring my worth by achievement – society’s definition of success. There …
No Problem
I’m sad to report that today, I was an airport asshole. As I stood in line for the ticket counter, jammed in among several screaming babies, frazzled moms with carry-on car seats, and a crew of eight buzz-cut army guys with two overstuffed duffle bags each, the wait around the four winding turnstiles to the ticket agents seemed endless. I …
How’s that Workin’ for Ya’?
One of my favorite quotes is, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” Many of us get stuck in patterns of thoughts and behaviors that prevent us from getting where we want to be in life. For example, I would very much like to get married someday, yet I’ve frequently …