[Update: After such a tumultuous 2020, as I and many hope for change in 2021, this blog about the wisdom of no change seems especially timely . . .] As I ponder the start to the new year, at first, I feel sorry for myself. I make the foolish, painful mistake of comparing myself to others and focusing on …
Hope vs. False Expectations
What’s the difference between hope and false expectations? How do we know when to hope for the best and when we’re deluding ourselves? In each case, we’re throwing ourselves open to faith, to things we can’t control or predict. Is there such a thing as healthy and unhealthy hope, and if so, where’s the line? On the one hand, I’ve often found the …
Fé, No Miedo
¿Alguna vez has conocido un ángel en persona en un lugar cotidiano que te dice algo tan profundo en el momento justo cuando más necesitas escucharlo? Ayer, el dependiente del servicio postal cerca de mi casa fue ese ángel. “Cruza tus dedos por mí, Roy” Le dije, pasándole mi libro en un sobre dirigido a un revisor de guiones en …
A Bug Story
Emma. That’s what I decided to name the unusually large mosquito eater that was zooming around my house. Those bugs are creepy looking, like spindly daddy long legs with wings, but anything that eats the annoying, disease-carrying stingers that constantly welt my sweet skin is a friend of mine. I turned around from my computer and saw Emma suddenly dive-bomb …
Waiting for Godot
In my graduate school library, there’s a really old, unreliable elevator. It’s so slow that it often takes a full ten minutes to get from the third floor to the first. Sometimes, it doesn’t come at all. As a joke, we nicknamed it “Godot,” referring to a Samuel Beckett play about two men waiting endlessly. Right now, my whole …
The Wisdom of Willy Wonka
“I want an Oompa Loompa, and I want it NOW!” screams little Veruca Salt to her father in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. While I dislike her spoiled brat character, I can certainly relate to her impatience and desire to get what she wants right now. Have you ever been in a “holding pattern” in your life, taking steps toward where …
Seriously?
As the woman from my health plan abruptly cut me off and put me on hold for the fourth time, I thought to myself, “Seriously?” While normally, I’m a very patient, laid-back person, two things canquickly send me over the edge: computer problems and bad customer service. It took two hours, three transfers, and five unfriendly, unhelpful service representatives to …
“After You, You Insist”
A few weeks ago, my friend and I drove our cars to a mall so we could shop together before heading our separate ways. As soon as we arrived to the parking lot, she accelerated past me to grab the closest parking spot. Literally squealing her wheels to make sure she got the best space, she left me in the dust …
Ready for Love
A few weeks ago, I got a fabulous invitation to spend the winter holidays in Sicily with an Italian hottie I met there last fall. As I was mulling over his offer, I got a very direct gut answer: “No. It’s time to meet the One.” Although it’s tempting to run off to Italy and play, I’m very clear: No …
Cool Your Jets: Slowing Down in Love and Life
My upstairs neighbor has a theory. “If you find someone you really like, you should wait 30 days before sleeping with them,” she told me over my kitchen table. “It worked for me and my husband.” I don’t know that I agree we need to wait a month before sleeping with someone. (In fact, I like to kiss a …